More Than Life

We’re not a good fit at all. But when’s that ever stopped anyone?

Glenn’s miserable, but he’s not as far down as he was last year when he swallowed enough pills to land him in the hospital. Having pushed his friends away and lied to them, he’s all alone, cooped up at home in his bedroom with only his laptop and one online friend for company. That is until Nik comes back for Easter.

Nik’s bright and colourful and flamboyant and definitely not Glenn’s type. But like that one night last year, Glenn can’t stay away. Nik’s been on his mind ever since, even if Glenn’s been ignoring him ever since as well. Nik’s frosty reaction to seeing him again quickly thaws, however, when Glenn starts opening up and telling Nik all his secrets. Nik’s been worried about him ever since their one-night-stand, after all, and upon getting to know Glenn better they end up spending a lot of time together. Glenn’s like a moth drawn to a flame and with Nik around life gains some colour again.

But Glenn’s not out and Nik’s never been in a closet in his life. Everything’s great when they’re in private and alone, but Glenn’s not comfortable being around Nik’s flamboyancy in public. And when his dangerous and violent brother starts to have suspicions of Glenn’s actions, Glenn’s forced to make a choice: allow himself to fall back to where he was last year or to stand up and take full control of his life again—including deciding whether he really wants to be with Nik or not.


Published: January 6th, 2017
Publisher: Arctic Circle Press
Genres: New adult m/m
Wordcount: 57,000
Tags: depression, flamboyant character, mental illness, writer


In hindsight, going over to talk to him wasn’t the best idea I’d ever had. Too bad I didn’t realise it until his fist was forcefully introduced to my face.

“How fucking dare you.” He glared at me so fiercely that if looks could kill I wouldn’t even exist. “Trying to chat me up again after all these months? When after last time you couldn’t even be arsed to answer my texts.”

I rubbed my jaw. He didn’t hit hard—too limp wristed for that—but I’d still felt it. “Yeah, about that—”

“I don’t want any excuses.” He crossed his arms over his chest, on the defensive now. “I’m not available for your pleasure every few months when you don’t have anyone else to fuck.”

“That’s not—”

“I don’t want to hear it!” He made to turn away and I grabbed his arm.

“It wasn’t like that, Nik. I was busy.”

He jerked his arm out of my grip and took two steps back. “So busy you can’t even send a fucking text? I mean, casual sex is great and all, but you’re not some fucking stranger I’m never going to see again. The least you could do is answer a few text messages.”

“Yeah, I know,” I admitted in a low voice, glancing around nervously. We were in a crowded bar, and though people were everywhere, no one seemed to be listening in. And there were no one I knew.

“Shouldn’t you be on Easter holiday with the rest of your friends?” He eyed me up and down, almost suspiciously. “Ben said Andreas and the rest of them left for Oppdal today.”

“I know. I decided to stay at home for the holiday.” I stayed home every day, but no one knew that. “I’m sorry I never answered. I just—I had a hard time.”

His lips tightened. “Tell me the truth then. You want me to stand here and chat with me, you tell me the fucking truth. What happened last year? Why didn’t you answer? Why were you in the hospital?”

Something prickled at the back of my neck and I reached back to scratch at it. “Can we go outside?” This wasn’t a conversation I wanted to have where other people could listen in.

He seemed like he wanted to refuse for a minute—but then he nodded and motioned for me to walk ahead.

I hurried down the stairs, got my jacket from the lads making sure people paid, then went out in the chilly winter air.

Nik came out a minute later, bundled up in his own jacket. “So, spill.”